Tug of War with Depression

peekIt’s been a while since I’ve posted. Truth is, I’m being stalked…it’s this pesky relentless little thing sometimes referred to as depression that seems to grab hold of me from time to time. That monster has the power to shake me up and tear me down. Sometimes I can slay that dragon like the superhuman I am. Sometimes the fight drains the ‘super’ right out of me. Sometimes it lasts a day, sometimes a week, sometimes a little longer, sometimes a lot longer. My battle is mild compared to the wars others fight with this demon. When I am struggling and I smile, it’s a joyous moment. I am not wearing a mask. There are moments that grab me, usually when I am with people, simple genuine moments of joy that gently kiss my spirit. There are a number of things that have the power to uplift my soul during difficult times if only for a short while. Kindness is the one gift that packs the biggest punch. Random Acts of Kindness, carrying them out and / or witnessing them has a definite impact during trying times. The challenge for me, is accepting these gifts when I find myself in the grips of despair.

Fortunately, I don’t live in this space, I only visit periodically from time to time. Those visits teach me the importance of compassion, thoughtfulness, and kindness. It is in that place that I learn the ugliness of self-sabotage. It is there I learn the importance and the impact of sharing kind hearted, loving words of encouragement to those around me. It is thanks to those darker moments that I am generous with compliments and smiles.

When I am in a good place, I am feeling hopeful and alive. My time is spent with a focus on staying positive and seeking out the gifts of every day bliss. Joy comes easily. These are the moments, days, weeks, months, time I relish. Appreciation and gratitude abound! I’ve come to recognize the importance of Creativity and Passion in keeping my spirits up. When I’m putting genuine effort into doing the things I am truly passionate about, I soar! It’s easy and powerful and real.

I am on a mission to play with my creativity and reignite my passion. My blog will reflect that mission. Renaming my blog “Mixed Bag of Nuts” might be suiting 🙂 It’s time to get creative, mix it up, shake it up, stand tall, grow fierce and just have fun.

Embrace your awesomeness 🙂

Finding the Gifts in Juvenile Arthritis

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Juvenile Arthritis is a pain in the ass joints. My son CJ was diagnosed with Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis when he was 9 years old. The diagnosis took my husband and I by surprise though it shouldn’t have…Arthritis is a prominent disease in both our families. The thing is, when we think of Arthritis we tend to think of it as exclusive to adults. People don’t talk much about Arthritis affecting our children. CJ complained a lot about pain. Mostly when he was asked to do something like take out the garbage (!!) We thought he suffered from a case of laziness. But it was natural for him  to complain only when he was asked to do something…when his joints caused him discomfort, he would sit down with his legs up and watch TV or play video games to give his legs a rest. Otherwise he was out climbing trees, riding his bike, jumping on the trampoline, or getting his chores done. The Doctors believe the pain had probably been there since birth, so the pain he felt was “normal” for him.  He never questioned it. He knew that when he was sore, he was tired and it helped to rest and so that’s exactly what he did, naturally. We only ever really needed to ask him to do something when he was ‘having a lazy day’ on the couch.

CJ had been training in Taekwondo since he was 7 years old – 2 years before his diagnosis. He loved it. He was determined that one day he would earn his Black Belt. Although the Arthritis did rear it’s ugly head a few times during practices and he missed his first tournament due to a flare up, he didn’t allow it to slow him down. He learned the true meaning of perseverance, and indomitable spirit.

CJ had always been thoughtful and compassionate of people and animals. Suffering the pain of Arthritis as the flare ups worsened actually made him even more so. He was driven and moved to “help people who couldn’t move their arms or their legs”. When we came across the Walk To Fight Arthritis, he was so determined to help that he took off down the road knocking on doors trying to raise funds. He ended up doing much more than that!

As people opened their doors to him, he shared with them his story which prompted many to share theirs as well. I will never forget the excitement in his voice as he threw open the door saying “Mom! I met more people who have Arthritis! I didn’t meet anyone my age with it, but lots of old people! And I raised a lot of money! Someone even gave me $20!” He raised $1800 that year and he only had 9 days to do it. People were so generous and CJ found a sense of connection with others in sharing his story.

Every year CJ sets a goal to beat last years donations. Last year he achieved that goal. CJ also sets a goal to keep moving toward his Black Belt.

In December 2013, CJ tested for his Black Belt. Part of the testing was to write an essay of his choosing. CJ’s wrote about Taekwondo and Arthritis. He wrote about the obstacles and the challenges he faced on his journey to becoming a Black Belt. He also wrote about the gifts that he has found in Arthritis – He knows who his true friends are. He has become more compassionate and caring toward others. He feels a sense of accomplishment contributing in the community. He has learned that by being himself and sharing his story, he has achieved what many adults do not; authenticity. He has learned to live by the tenets of Taekwondo in every day life; Courtesy, Integrity, Perseverance, Self-Control, and Indomitable Spirit.

On September 15th 2013, CJ was presented with The Ontario Youth Award for his efforts with The Arthritis Society. This is the first time this prestigious award has been presented to someone in the Ottawa area. On December 7th 2013, CJ earned his Black Belt and although it is considered a great honor to be tested by a Master in Taekwondo, the Master singled CJ out telling him the honor was HIS to have been a part of CJ’s journey in Taekwondo because he emanates the essence of Taekwondo in the Dojan as well as out in the community.

When life presents you with a challenge, learn from it, find the gift in it, and kick it’s  joint ass 🙂

If you are interested in helping CJ reach this years goal please visit his donation page here

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Living Your Best Life – Part 3

If you are waiting for your ideal life to materialize, it’s time that you realize your life is waiting for you!

Here’s where change happens! This week we are going to take the first step to living life on your terms.

What are you hoping to take from the “Living Your Best Life” series? My best life starts with you…I love blogging, I love putting together the videos. My passion is helping you discover yours. My reward is sharing in your journey so please keep in touch. I would love to hear from you 🙂

Embrace your awesomeness!!

Living my Best Life Helping others Live Theirs

Helping people to discover their dreams and live their most joyful life is my greatest passion. Nothing makes my heart sing more than doing exactly that. Thankfully I had many curious friends willing to volunteer as my guinea pigs for each new approach I learned in all the training and research I immersed myself into which provided me with the opportunity to be part of some amazing changes in their lives. The most thrilling benefit to this work continues to be watching the difference in the lives of my children as they put into practice the teachings they learned from their Momma 🙂

Today I would like to invite you to take a journey with me, a journey where you get to be the star of your own story. No RSVP necessary, I’m ready when you are.

A Journey Within

A Journey WithinIt’s been so long since I’ve written, I forgot my WordPress password! If you’re reading this wondering where I’ve been, I took a break. A long break. I write when I feel inspired. When I feel I have a message to share. The messages come from a place deeper than my own heart. Through this blog, you have joined me on my spiritual journey. For the last while, I’ve been struggling to put into words what’s been going on within.

Normally easily excitable in good stress and in bad, I am now less excitable and filled with a quiet peace. It’s not always a happy peace, but it is a peace no less. Normally positive with a belief of “everyone is doing the best they can even when it seems wrong to others”, I find myself questioning these very beliefs. How is it that when I look around I see genuinely good people being hurt or misguided by people who don’t seem to be “doing the best they can” or even doing what they surely know to be right. I stopped reading. I stopped writing. I took a little hiatus from my social life. Even kept social media to a bare minimum. I needed to explore my beliefs listening only to the messages within my own heart. I haven’t yet decided whether this shift in thinking feels better or not, but it often somehow feels more real, like a truth.

I believe that positivity plays a key role in our perceptions, and that our perceptions shape our world. Our unique perceptions allow us to see our lives as a beautiful journey even through the challenges we inevitably face. Perceptions can also allow us to see our lives as one hot hopeless mess. It’s not about seeing the world through rose colored glasses, positivity simply helps us to see life through a more beautiful lens.

I believe that most people have good hearts and genuinely do the best they can with what they know. Even when it doesn’t make sense to the rest of the world. I call this being led by the light. People who live their lives being led by compassion, connectivity, and purpose. As there are people who are led by light, there are also those who are easily driven by darkness. People who are driven by vengeance, anger, and fear. I believe that as perception is a matter of choice, so is the manner in which we choose to be led. It is not a matter of being created this way or that. It is a choice we are given every single moment of every single day.  We choose whether the decisions we make allow us to be driven by darkness or led by light.

I’ve shed more tears than I care to share struggling to figure out why bad things happen to good people. Why life seems so unfair sometimes. I don’t have the answers, I likely never will. All I have is my own heart and the gift to make my own decisions. I choose to be led by the light. I choose to believe that when “bad” things happen, somewhere within it is a lesson we must learn. One that will help us along our journey somehow, someway, one day. I continue to believe that life is intricately organized chaos. The people we meet, the challenges we face, the places we end up, there is an explicit reason for all of it.

During my break from reading, writing, and socializing,  I also took an unexpected break from dreaming. This wasn’t a choice, I still can’t explain it. I’m not sure if it stems from a fear of success or failure after all that has transpired with my book. (For those of you who don’t know,  it is due to a series of unfortunate events that  I no longer have a publisher, I will not be compensated for any online sales, and all the money I put into being published is gone. If I wish to sell my book once my copies are gone, I will need to come up with another chunk of cash in order to find a new publisher. OUCH! it still hurts!) For now, and for the last while, I have been committed to each day rather than to my dreams of the future. It’s not nearly as exciting most of the time, but I must admit, it’s been surprising and I might be falling in love with it. I am open to opportunities that present themselves. I am taking on small projects that I wouldn’t have had time for while living in my dream bubble.

Thank you, readers for providing me with a space to express myself and thank you for being my silent partner on this journey of self discovery. It’s not always a beautiful journey with chirping birds, sunshine and songs, sometimes it’s more like pain. Sometimes, it’s somewhere right in the middle. Writing allows me to share a piece of my deepest self . It requires a raw vulnerability which pushes me just far enough outside my comfort zone to grow.  I wish I could take you inside my heart just once to feel what I feel when I reach out to you, and you reach back to me. I fully embrace your awesomeness 🙂

You may also enjoy My Faith Unveiled , Did God Overestimate Me, 10 Lessons I Learned From Debra Poneman

Butt Jiggles to Vemma – Journey to Health

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Inspired by Louise Voisin’s journey and disappointed with my own deteriorating health, I decided it was time for change. High anxiety, TMJ, headaches, chest pains, irregular heart beats, exhaustion, laziness, foggy thinking, it all had to go. I knew my body was shutting down on me and if I didn’t make necessary changes, there was no doubt in my mind I was headed for a breakdown. My kids deserve the best of me and they were being severely short changed.

Not having a clue as to where to start, I sought out the help of a Wellness professional. Knowing in your heart that your body is in trouble is one thing, hearing it out loud and seeing it on paper is a whole other experience. My pancreas, my kidneys, my digestive system, and my heart are only a few of the organs that aren’t doing so well. The supplements that I require are numerous. I’m not taking 6-8 here, I’m talking a dozen or so. A complete overhaul. Overwhelm. Despair. There’s no way I could afford to “fix” this and yet how can I afford not to?

After grieving over the body I took for granted for so long, I set out on a quest to find something that worked for me. It had to be simple, easy, tasty, and affordable. All musts. Determined. I was on a mission. If not for me, for my kids’ mother.

I came across a company called Vemma. Vemma has been featured in Esquire, Ms Fitness, and Men’s Health magazines. It’s been featured on both Dr. Oz and Dr. Phil. Their new Bod•ē program was designed with TV celebrity transformation specialists Chris and Heidi Powell. How could I not try it?

I’ve been on the Bod•ē program for a week now and I absolutely love it. My energy is increased, I’m more productive, more alert and aware, I sleep well at night. I feel great! I’ve even lost 3 lbs. and truth be told I haven’t even exercised yet! My daughter has noticed such a change, she’s started on the shakes too. She says “Mom, you’re glowing! Even your skin looks better!”

True story – My kids made up this “fun” game where they playfully kick, knee, or box my bum and giggle. Yesterday as they began their little game I hear “awww….it doesn’t jiggle like it used to. That’s no fun!” My heart sang! Oh, sweet victory!

We’ve already placed an order for Vemma’s Next juice to super charge the kids immune systems. In fact, I’m so passionate about the transformation it’s already made in my life, and I’m so utterly impressed with the company itself that I’ve decided to join the company as a Brand Partner.

As passionate as I am about helping people live their best lives, Vemma is a perfect fit! As far as I’m concerned, of all the truly awesome transformational courses and workshops I’ve done, this is by far the biggest transformation I’ve undergone. This is a lifestyle change…a total overall wellness makeover.

Feeling genuinely great is addictive, even more so than chocolate! I look forward to my shake every morning, it tastes so good, it was easy to commit to the program…even for me!

If you’re looking for a health makeover of your own, I would love to be part of your transformation. For more information on Vemma products click here and feel free to contact me directly anytime.

Here’s to an even better us!

Embrace Our Health!

Embrace Your Awesomeness!

Pamela Tourigny

Veganizer, Advocate, Mentor & Coach

beanvegan.wordpress.com/

Living Green. Bean Vegan.

THECOLORMAGE

Pittsburgh LGBTQ Gay Author Speaker | Color Therapy Chakra Young Living Essential Oils Aromatherapy Zodiac Horoscope Tarot

The Juicing Nomads

“To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.” ― Oscar Wilde

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