Authentic Forgiveness

forgiveness

When we can recognize ourselves in others and we can accept that all of creation is connected, we learn the meaning of authentic forgiveness.

Authentic forgiveness is the ability to let go of grievances; criticism, objections, judgements, guilt, blame – and turn those grievances into acceptance.

Accepting that life is sometimes unfair. Accepting that most people are not going to fall under our idea of ‘perfect’. Accepting that everyone is perfectly who they are. Accepting every mistake (yes, even the big ones!) as an opportunity for correction, an opportunity to learn, an opportunity for growth.  Accepting that what might be right for you is not necessarily what is right for the next person. Accepting that things are rarely as they seem. Accepting that what may seem like an injustice may actually come to be a blessing. And finally, accepting that God’s plan for you may be different than what you had planned yourself.

Ego plays a dark role in all our lives. It’s that annoying little voice inside that tells us we are inadequate, that we need to prove ourselves to everyone around us, making us believe that we are somehow better or that we don’t quite measure up to others, leaving us questioning whether we are failures or too good for our own good. Ego’s will is to keep us feeling separate and alone. Ego is our greatest deceiver.

The truth is that we are all sharing this experience together. We all fight the same battles, the only difference is in how our problems and challenges present themselves and how we react to them. Consider this for a moment: All problems stem from separation.

If this is true, authentic forgiveness / connection is the answer to every problem. When authentic forgiveness is achieved all that is left is absolute love and acceptance for all that is.

We will do anything to protect and care for those we feel completely connected to.We will make time for them. We will smile and acknowledge them. We will make sure they are fed, clothed, and loved. We will swallow our pride, let go of our ego and apologize when necessary. We will allow them to make mistakes, even if sometimes we are hurt in the process. When we feel connected, when we let go of judgments, blame, and grievances, we accept. We accept every person. We accept each moment. We accept our circumstances. We love ourselves enough to learn from every person, each circumstance and make change when necessary.

In a world of connection and absolute forgiveness, no one is left behind. Everyone is cared for, fed, and provided for. Everyone is loved and accepted exactly as they are.

All blessings and miracles in the world are visible from this place of absolute truth.

May your day be filled with love and miracles!

 

Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – Dealing With Difficult People

Featuring artwork by Nicole Cote and The Heart Painter

Dear Angel,

Remember this: “Those who are the hardest to love are the ones who need it the most.” Dan Millman said that, not me.

Everyone on this earth has to deal with difficult people. When you are faced with this challenge, try to remember that every single human being wants the same three things; love, happiness, and a sense of purpose.

In every moment, every one of us does the best we can with the knowledge we have. Some people do things because they honestly don’t know any better. Sometimes it’s easy to give into greed, jealously, or selfishness.

Supporting and encouraging you from Heaven,

Love Mom xo

See also Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – Life is an Obstacle Course, Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – Embrace Your Uniqueness, Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – The First Letter, and The Making of a Book That Broke My Heart.

On June 26th, Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo will celebrate it’s official launch. Anyone who orders the book that day from Amazon.com will also receive a list of downloadable gifts offered to you from transformational leaders Shawne Duperon, Teresa Degrosbois, Debra Poneman, Susan Heim, Shayla Logan, Temba Spirit, and Heather Cournoyer.

In honor of this most exciting event, I will be sharing with you a letter from Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo every day from now until then. If what you read touches your heart, I encourage you to please share it with others ❤

Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – Life is an Obstacle Course

Image

Artwork done my Nicole Cote and The Heart Painter

My Darling,

Life is an obstacle course. It is completely unpredictable and not always kind.

Obstacles and failures are necessary for our growth. Without them, we could never truly appreciate our achievements. Try to understand that every failure, every disaster, is simply a stepping stone to your ultimate achievements.

Watching over you always,

Love Mom xo

Be sure to check out Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – Embrace Your Uniqueness, Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – The First Letter, and The Making of a Book That Broke My Heart.

On June 26th, Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo will celebrate it’s official launch. Anyone who orders the book that day from Amazon.com will also receive a list of downloadable gifts offered to you from transformational leaders Shawne Duperon, Teresa Degrosbois, Debra Poneman, Susan Heim, Shayla Logan, Temba Spirit, and Heather Cournoyer.

In honor of this most exciting event, I will be sharing with you a letter from Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo every day from now until then. If what you read touches your heart, I encourage you to please share it with others ❤

Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – The First Letter

On June 26th, Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo will celebrate it’s official launch. Anyone who orders the book that day from Amazon.com will also receive a list of downloadable gifts offered to you from transformational leaders Shawne Duperon, Teresa Degrosbois, Debra Poneman, Susan Heim, Shayla Logan, Temba Spirit, and Heather Cournoyer.

In honor of this most exciting event, I will be sharing with you a letter from Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo every day from now until then. If what you read touches your heart, I encourage you to please share it with others ❤

Heart Painter

My Dear Child,

I want you to know that your life has made a remarkable difference in mine.

You’ve touched my life in ways that I can’t explain. I’ve learned more from you than I’ve learned from anyone or anything else in this world. You are a true gift.

Make no mistake; I am not the only one who feels this way. I’m proud to say I’ve seen you touch many people’s lives in many different ways and you’ve been doing it since the day you were born.

I am honored to call you my child.

Always by your side,

Love Mom xo

Where it all began: The Making of A Book That Broke My Heart

Not-So-Solo Trip To Toronto

My husband (sporting the Movember look) and I on Young Street in Toronto

It would seem that all the excitement from my recent solo adventure in the big city had caused my husband enough anxiety to insist on joining me when I was booked for another one day orientation back in Toronto 🙂

Now, I’ll be honest with you…as much as I was looking forward to this mini trip, I had my reservations. My husband tends to be a little impatient in rush hour traffic when we go to Ottawa. He gets a little agitated when if he gets lost in the city. He can be a bit of a firecracker in highly populated areas. Did I mention that my orientation was booked in Toronto at the same time as the 100th Grey Cup game? And we were staying at The Madison Manor which was located just a couple blocks away from the stadium? As apprehensive as I was, I was excited too. We rarely get time to ourselves, just the two of us, it felt like I was dating my husband!

The drive down went surprisingly well…okay, I fell asleep 3 times. Toronto was congested with football fevered fans. There were people everywhere all dressed up, blowing horns, screaming, and cheering. We decided to grab a bite to eat at a place named “famous” for their wings. We ate the wings…we both agreed, they couldn’t be famous for anything other than a walking heart attack, they tasted like grease and we both knew our stomachs would pay for it later that night – if we even made it that long!

Our hotel was great. Not great in a fancy, over-the- top way, fancy in a cozy, quaint, old fashioned, hospitable way. It was nice. Perfect actually.

Being the fly-by-the-seat-of-our-pants (aka never-plan-anything-until-the-very-last-moment) kind of people that we are, we scrambled to find some entertainment. Of course, it was the Sunday night of the 100th Grey Cup…there was nothing else going on. NOTHING. We headed out to Kensington Market and arrived just in time to see all the shops close. I must give my husband credit here – he (like most people I know), doesn’t remotely relate to my sense of style. But, (I suppose to allow for me to bask in my happy place) he accompanied me to every hippie clothing store that caught my eye and with a curious look of bewilderment on his face, he smiled and nodded as I excitedly pointed out multicolored bags and jackets full of peace signs and banners with New Age quotes. (I think he was secretly relieved the market was shutting down.)

When we headed for the movies and I fought the urge to beg him to watch Breaking Dawn (why would I put myself through that movie again you ask? Read here lol) we got tickets for Freefall instead. It’s the least I could do considering I had fallen asleep 3 times while he drove for 5 hours and, well, we can’t ignore the hippie stores 🙂 Note to self: Next time we find ourselves heading to Toronto during the 100th Grey Cup game, buy tickets to attend.

Monday night we took a short stroll down Young Street and ate dinner at Milestones before heading back on the long drive home…I don’t remember the last time we had a quiet dinner out just the two of us. It was weird nice. We talked about our days and at one point he told me I should become a Financial Advisor. I laughed and told him that maybe one day he would have the opportunity to marry one. He looked at me and said “I don’t think I would ever be able to get along with a Financial Advisor” Perplexed, I asked why then would he ever suggest that I become one. He simply replied “Well, that’s different. You and I, we don’t usually ever see eye to eye anyway. It would just be more of the same.” Great! 🙂

Heading back home in the dark, I was determined to stay awake so he wouldn’t be driving alone. No worries, there….my insomnia never lets me down! Snow started to fall. At first it was light and beautiful. It gradually made it’s way to fast and furious. You know when you’re driving in a blizzard,  you look out the window and it feels like you’ve been transported into a Star Wars space shuttle flying through the universe? Don’t tell me I’m the only one who sees it. I know you’ve seen it too.

We were both starting to get a little anxious about visibility – or lack there of – so I did all I could to calm our nerves…I started to sing. Hmmmm…..the look on Curtis’ face told me that my singing voice sounded better in my own ears than in his. He tried his best to keep a straight face. Well, at least it made him laugh 😉

The further we drove, the worse the roads became. At one point we couldn’t see anything. Not the middle of the road, not the side of the road, only millions of giant white snowflakes coming right at us. We both looked at each other and wondered how we would drive any further. There were no hotels nearby and nowhere to stop to wait it out. At that exact moment, the radio played “We Will Die Young”. I kid you not! We just looked at each other wondering out loud if this is how it ends? Does everyone get a sign like this when their time comes?

I told Curtis that if anything were ever to happen to me, he deserved to find someone who “had it all together”, someone who was always well prepared for each and every day, someone who would take good care of him, and be able to find their keys, someone who was my exact polar opposite. My heart swelled when he shook his head and said that no, he wouldn’t want his life to be any other way than what it was right now. I never knew until the moment I heard those words coming out of his mouth, how much I needed to hear them.

The roads cleared, I continued to sing, Curtis continued to practice tuning me out, and life returned to normal….with a just a hint of even-better!

Isn’t it beautiful how life finds a way of working itself out so imperfectly perfect?

Embrace your awesomeness, and the crazy beautiful world in which you live!

The Truth about My Marriage

My husband drives me nuts, and I drive him equally mad. All too often I’ve wondered how it is that we ended up married at all. From what I can gather, our marriage was based on a total misunderstanding. He was under the impression that because I was employed by the government working at a financial institution, I was a secure and stable girl and as an added bonus, I was a financial expert. Boy, was he in for a shocker!

At the time, my husband was doing work he loved as a Sheet Metal Worker. He was a caring father to his son and we always had a blast. We would take off on vacation at the blink of an eye, never making reservations, sometimes not even really being sure about where we would end up. In my eyes, I saw my husband as a carefree risk-taker, someone who took life as it came and had fun with it. Oh, if only I knew!

In our first year of marriage, we were blessed with a baby girl. My husband became the stable and secure provider. I, on the other hand, looked into my baby girls eyes and saw life through a fresh new lens. I vowed to teach my daughter to choose happiness throughout her whole life, and how could I do that without leading by example? I became the carefree risk-taker focused primarily on joy and being the best mother I could be.

My husbands career was stable and secure while mine was virtually non-existent as I bounced from one interest to the next never taking into consideration my husbands dream of a stable and secure life. I had quit my  job to open a home daycare. I took a dozen different courses and trained with best selling authors and spiritual leaders in my quest to find a source of income that would allow me to be the best me I could be while providing me with time for our children. The journey I took in finding myself was anything BUT stable and secure. The more I spread my wings, the more stable my husband became. I took his secure world and turned it completely upside down. As he worked to build stability, I fought to live a bubble of possibility, a beautiful bubble, but a bubble no less.
Every time I lost my keys, he sighed. Every time he talked bills, I rolled my eyes. When I talked memories, he spoke of the future. He sung “tried and true” and I shouted “been there done that”. Home renovations never came to be because we couldn’t agree on anything. I’m not going to lie, some days it was a virtual shit storm! We were throwing each other far outside our comfort zones. I misunderstood his discomfort and unease with my freestyle approach to life as a disappointment in who I was.

Things are rarely as they seem

Thankfully, becoming a published author has allowed me to find a happy medium and prove that I could achieve more than even I thought was possible. I still live in my beautiful bubble, I’ve learned to invite my husband in as well. He seems to like the bubble for the most part, he shares in my dreams, and agrees that what he may have considered impossible at one time, might not be so impossible after all.

The truth is, life is always divinely organized. For who better to teach me to keep my feet on the ground than him? And who better to teach him the beauty of life unexpected and the possibility of achieving the impossible than me?

I owe the life I’ve had the privilege of living to my husband and his stability. Without him, I wouldn’t be me.

Today, I choose to fully embrace my husbands awesomeness and the gifts he has brought to my life.

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Staying Positive in a Badass World

I’m not always positive. There are times where I feel like my world is falling apart, times where I feel lost and alone. I get depressed.  And there are times when it takes every ounce of strength inside of me not to frickin’ loose it! But for the most part, I do try to live positively.

This is a practice that takes discipline, hard work, and patience.  So here it is, my no-fail positivity booster list. Even when I’m going thru a particularly rough time, these habits have the power to raise my spirits. The only challenge is remembering to practice them. The more I do, the better I feel. The more often I practice, the happier I am.

* Be grateful. A dear friend and I have a tradition to gift each other with gratitude journals on birthdays since filling their pages have had such a powerful impact on both our lives. It helps to keep perspective especially on particularly rough days. “I am so grateful that my children are sleeping safely in their beds” – that kind of clarity has the power to make for a pretty damn good day.

* Give love freely. Receive love freely. It’s easy to give love to those who love us back but loving those who don’t reciprocate takes practice. Practice!

Easier said than done. Am I right?

* Surround yourself with people who bring you joy.

* Learn to love what is. Here is the golden rule:

If you’re unhappy with something change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude about it.

 * Design your life. Decide what you want in your life to look like and create it!

* Sing in the car, loudly every single chance you get. Be mindful of the road and everyone else on it but if you can pull off dancing too, do it! Yes, if you have children they may complain but they will get over it.
 * In trying times, always look for lessons to be learned and try to keep in mind that things are rarely as they seem. Life is always trying to teach us something and let’s face it, we’ve all got room for improvement. Well, I certainly do anyways!

Good times become good memories, bad times become good lessons.

* Trust that God’s plan is better than yours. Accept that some of God’s greatest gifts are what we may perceive as unanswered prayers. Sometimes what seems like a disaster is a blessing in disguise.

I got your back. Love, God xo

 * Always look for the humor in every day challenges. Losing your keys, forgetting to take out something for supper, pets eating the furniture, misplaced lists, getting lost – it all brings a little adventure to your already exciting life. Stuck in traffic? Okay so you’re late for work and you can sing a little longer.
 * Allow yourself to screw up. Royally and otherwise.

 * Forgive yourself for screwing up and embrace your humanity. We are all here to learn and grow, and we can’t learn if we don’t make mistakes.

 * Celebrate the lessons you learn along your journey.

Every day is an opportunity to make tomorrow even better.

* Celebrate everything!

* Listen with compassion. Every person you meet comes with valid concerns, opinions, input, and suggestions. Remember that we are all doing the best we can with what we know. Listen and you will always learn.

Alone we are strong, together we are stronger.

* When you find yourself frustrated at the world around you, allow yourself to be frustrated. Sometimes life stinks. Accepting what is, isn’t always easy.

* Love yourself exactly as you are. For who you were, who you are, and who you will become. You are not perfect, it’s not reasonable to expect that you should be. Nor is it reasonable to expect others to be perfect. Imperfection means we are halfway normal. We all have unique gifts to offer those around us. Actively seek out the gifts in yourself and in everyone you encounter.

Here’s to your Happy!

Journey Through Miracles – a personal story

 

I’d like to share with you a personal story of empowerment and inspiration; my journey through A Course in Miracles.

A Course In Miracles is a unique, universal, self-study spiritual thought system that teaches that the way to Love and Inner Peace is through Forgiveness. Although my journey is yet to be completed, it still deserves to be shared.

Through the course, I learned to accept that things are rarely as they seem. Everything I see in my world is a matter of perception, rather than a matter of truth. Learning this truth allowed me to see each person, myself included, as beings doing the best we can with what we know. I learned to listen with both ears and a compassionate and open heart. I learned to question less the ways of the world and trust that everything is as it should be for reasons only known to God.

I also learned the importance of my own self-worth. Realizing that not only am I enough, I am precisely, and exactly as I was always intended to be. I think this was the hardest truth for me to accept. I hadn’t realized how unworthy I felt of receiving love until I pushed myself through this lesson. Tears streamed down my face as I recognized how my lack of self-worth affected every single relationship I had in and throughout my life. It affected my choices, it hindered my happiness. I allowed myself to come last. I allowed myself to be hurt. I allowed myself to be taken for granted. It affected every area of my life and every relationship I had. The moment I genuinely accepted and embraced my worth, everything changed. Instantaneously, without warning, without reason, the most beautiful change had taken place.

My favorite lesson so far is that of forgiveness. It was also the most difficult. Forgiveness is hard. Forgiving the past, forgiving those who hurt me, forgiving those who continue to cause me grief was hard. Forgiving myself was harder. I learned that forgiveness is not about being okay with an injustice, it’s not about ignoring a problem. Forgiveness is simply understanding that as humans, we are all created to make mistakes. Our mistakes teach us to be and do better. It’s so important to remember – even when we don’t understand – We are all doing the best we can and things are rarely as they seem. Forgiveness is to me the most beautiful lesson so far because I have learned to feel worthy enough to walk away from those who cause me pain, and not only have I been able to forgive them, I am able to genuinely love them. I don’t always agree with their choices, I don’t always like them, I keep healthy boundaries, and I love them from a place of peace.

When I started A Course in Miracles, I was excited to see miracles unfold before me, now as I continue through the Course, I’m fascinated to see the miracles unfolding within me!

Here’s to you and your journey!

Embrace Your Awesomeness!

 

Unique No-Fail Christmas Gifts

The gift giving season is upon us. Everyone’s running around with endless shopping lists and maxed out credit cards.

Am I the only one who thinks it’s time to reconsider this Xmas thing? …. OR maybe it’s time to start REMEMBERING….It’s Christmas!!!

There are 2 gifts at the top of everyone’s wish list that have been there for so long we all forget to include them. They are guaranteedtomakeanyonesmile, nofail gifts and can be tailored to suit any budget. With the cost of everything on the rise, these gifts can’t afford to be missed this year.

Compliments – Nowadays genuine compliments are relatively rare, found only in the souls with the purest of hearts.

Genuine compliments are one of life’s most soughtafter indulgences. A simple compliment can turn a mediocre day into a fabulous one. It can uplift spirits, and boost self-esteem in a single dose!

A compliment can be given on it’s own or presented in the form of a letter. Imagine the simplicity of it…..a sincere keepsake!

Be forwarned, once you start handing them out, they instill such a joyful feeling, it’s likely you may not ever be able to stop!

The second gift is Time. Also a rare treasure, Time is a sacred gift, it is also probably the most cherished of all gifts.

Time is a gift that creates memories. It is quite spectacular really, it’s reward is instantaneous and the memories can last a lifetime. Unique, exquisite and amusing. A winning combination – wouldn’t you agree?

Of course if neither of these gifts generate a smile for a certain someone, you could always point them in the direction of a fabulous feel-good blog such as this one where they can continue to constantly be reminded of their awesomeness 😉

May the spirit of Christmas fill your heart with enough love, hope and happiness to last the whole year thru!

I fully embrace your Awesomeness!

It’s your turn! Do you have any unique thoughtful gift ideas to share?

Is Your Love Real or Just An Imitation?

One of life’s greatest gifts is the gift of being in love.

With so many variations and imitations, how can we possibly know for sure if the love we have is real? Not all of us have had the pleasure of experiencing real love, though the vast majority have experienced the very real pain of heartache time and time again.

Love is described by many as being unpredictable, exciting and fun, filled with heart palpitations and sweaty palms. It’s often compared to an emotional rollercoaster. However, those lucky enough to have experienced real love describe it more like comfort, compromise, hard work and joy. And it is depicted more as an incredibly sacred space.

In my eyes, Love knows when you’re feeling less than your best. Love reminds you of your true essence when you have forgotten. Love will offer you a leg to stand on when you feel you don’t have one. Love is a partnership. Love is unquestionable trust. Love always wants to see you shine. Love is mutual respect and support. Love is your confidante. Love is selfless. Love is always open to compromise. Love keeps you strong, resilient and confident. Love sees your potential and will encourage you to unleash it. Love is the arms that are always open to take you into them. 

How is it that some of us find real love and some of us don’t? Is it Luck? Or is it simply that those who have found it, have had enough self-love and courage to walk away from an imitation leaving room for real love to enter into their lives?

How do you know if the Love you have is real? I suppose this question is only answered when you no longer find yourself asking the question.

❤ Embrace Your Awesomeness ❤

 It’s your turn! How do YOU distinguish between real love and imitation love? Does true love really exist or is it just a fairytale?

Pamela Tourigny

Veganizer, Advocate, Mentor & Coach

beanvegan.wordpress.com/

Living Green. Bean Vegan.

THECOLORMAGE

Pittsburgh LGBTQ Gay Author Speaker | Color Therapy Chakra Young Living Essential Oils Aromatherapy Zodiac Horoscope Tarot

The Juicing Nomads

“To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.” ― Oscar Wilde

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