Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – Dealing With Difficult People

Featuring artwork by Nicole Cote and The Heart Painter

Dear Angel,

Remember this: “Those who are the hardest to love are the ones who need it the most.” Dan Millman said that, not me.

Everyone on this earth has to deal with difficult people. When you are faced with this challenge, try to remember that every single human being wants the same three things; love, happiness, and a sense of purpose.

In every moment, every one of us does the best we can with the knowledge we have. Some people do things because they honestly don’t know any better. Sometimes it’s easy to give into greed, jealously, or selfishness.

Supporting and encouraging you from Heaven,

Love Mom xo

See also Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – Life is an Obstacle Course, Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – Embrace Your Uniqueness, Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – The First Letter, and The Making of a Book That Broke My Heart.

On June 26th, Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo will celebrate it’s official launch. Anyone who orders the book that day from Amazon.com will also receive a list of downloadable gifts offered to you from transformational leaders Shawne Duperon, Teresa Degrosbois, Debra Poneman, Susan Heim, Shayla Logan, Temba Spirit, and Heather Cournoyer.

In honor of this most exciting event, I will be sharing with you a letter from Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo every day from now until then. If what you read touches your heart, I encourage you to please share it with others ❤

Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – Life is an Obstacle Course

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Artwork done my Nicole Cote and The Heart Painter

My Darling,

Life is an obstacle course. It is completely unpredictable and not always kind.

Obstacles and failures are necessary for our growth. Without them, we could never truly appreciate our achievements. Try to understand that every failure, every disaster, is simply a stepping stone to your ultimate achievements.

Watching over you always,

Love Mom xo

Be sure to check out Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – Embrace Your Uniqueness, Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – The First Letter, and The Making of a Book That Broke My Heart.

On June 26th, Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo will celebrate it’s official launch. Anyone who orders the book that day from Amazon.com will also receive a list of downloadable gifts offered to you from transformational leaders Shawne Duperon, Teresa Degrosbois, Debra Poneman, Susan Heim, Shayla Logan, Temba Spirit, and Heather Cournoyer.

In honor of this most exciting event, I will be sharing with you a letter from Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo every day from now until then. If what you read touches your heart, I encourage you to please share it with others ❤

Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – Embrace Your Uniqueness

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Featuring art by The Heart Painter and Nicole Cote

Dear Love,

You were born with special qualities and traits. It’s so important to love and accept every part of yourself as a valuable contribution to what makes you so wonderfully you. No one else can be you better than you can!

You were born exactly the way you are to learn the lessons and achieve the miracles that only you can.

Embrace your uniqueness!

Loving you just as you are, forever.

Love Mom xo

On June 26th, Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo will celebrate it’s official launch. Anyone who orders the book that day from Amazon.com will also receive a list of downloadable gifts offered to you from transformational leaders Shawne Duperon, Teresa Degrosbois, Debra Poneman, Susan Heim, Shayla Logan, Temba Spirit, and Heather Cournoyer.

In honor of this most exciting event, I will be sharing with you a letter from Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo every day from now until then. If what you read touches your heart, I encourage you to please share it with others ❤

Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo – The First Letter

On June 26th, Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo will celebrate it’s official launch. Anyone who orders the book that day from Amazon.com will also receive a list of downloadable gifts offered to you from transformational leaders Shawne Duperon, Teresa Degrosbois, Debra Poneman, Susan Heim, Shayla Logan, Temba Spirit, and Heather Cournoyer.

In honor of this most exciting event, I will be sharing with you a letter from Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo every day from now until then. If what you read touches your heart, I encourage you to please share it with others ❤

Heart Painter

My Dear Child,

I want you to know that your life has made a remarkable difference in mine.

You’ve touched my life in ways that I can’t explain. I’ve learned more from you than I’ve learned from anyone or anything else in this world. You are a true gift.

Make no mistake; I am not the only one who feels this way. I’m proud to say I’ve seen you touch many people’s lives in many different ways and you’ve been doing it since the day you were born.

I am honored to call you my child.

Always by your side,

Love Mom xo

Where it all began: The Making of A Book That Broke My Heart

My Child is My Hero – His Journey With An Invisible Disease

cjI can’t tell you how much it hurts my heart when people judge what they clearly know nothing about. As many of you know, my son CJ was diagnosed with Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis two years ago when he was only 9 years old. The journey with this disease hasn’t been easy, especially for CJ.

CJ is an active kid. He loves to run around, ride his bike, and push his limits every chance he gets. The kid’s a spitfire. He just doesn’t stop. When he first started complaining about pain, we didn’t take him seriously. “I can’t take out the garbage, my feet are too sore”, “I don’t want to go to school, my legs are sore”. When it came to “I don’t think I can go to Taekwondo tonight, my wrists are really sore” we started to wonder what was going on. I’m ashamed to admit “Oh CJ, you’re fine once you get there, suck it up and let’s get going” came out of my mouth more than once. He never complained when I said it, he showed up every time. I often wonder if there are other children and parents who go through the same thing without a single thought that something more serious than ‘laziness’ might be going on.

CJ’s likely had Arthritis his whole life, he’s just learned to live with the pain as ‘normal’. When he shows up and gives his 100% at school, in sports, and on outings, he does so in spite of the pain. As he says “my body might be hurting but I’d rather that than miss out on the fun”. Each day is different. Sometimes the pain is barely there, sometimes his joints just don’t work so well, and sometimes the pain is severe. When he has a flare up (as long as it’s not too severe), it will usually only last a few hours if he stays off his feet, doesn’t use his wrist or whatever joint is causing pain that day. Using his crutches helps with a speedier recovery. He won’t use his crutches anymore though. He suffers through the pain, even if it’s worsened and prolonged because he doesn’t get treated the same when he uses them. People aren’t so nice when he’s got his crutches. They aren’t so nice when he complains of pain. Arthritis is invisible and is therefore often misunderstood. The judgements just don’t come from the kids in school, a great many come from the adults in his life as well. “Big faker” gets tossed around a lot. “Milking it” does too. “He’s smiling, he’s fine” they say. “He only uses his crutches for a bit then leaves them behind to run with his friends and grab them again” Yes, that is exactly what he does. He uses the crutches to alleviate the pain and allow his joints to heal. When he sees his friends playing it hurts more to miss out on the fun. He plays through the pain knowing full well he will pay for it later. They call it faking. I call it perseverance and determination.

Imagine being 10 years old unable to get out of bed in the morning to go to the washroom, having to rely on your mom to carry you around. Imagine being the Mom who sees her sons tears knowing that this day, he will be too tired and too sore to move at all. Knowing that no matter she does this day, there is nothing she can do to relieve his pain. The Arthritis is not limited to CJ’s ankles, and wrists. He has Arthritis in his spine, his hips, even his jaw. Will it continue to get worse? What does his future hold? Will it ever be cured? Will he grow out of it? There just isn’t enough research available to answer the questions that rest in our minds all the time.

The Arthritis Society has given CJ the opportunity to be part of an elite group when he feels left out from the rest of the world. Since CJ’s diagnosis, he has raised over $5000 for the organization that gave him back his confidence and self-worth. This year, our family will be hosting a fundraiser to help raise funds for this exceptional organization and in an effort to get kids taking about this disease, we will be contacting schools in the area to see if they would be interested in putting a basket together to raffle off on our big day.

If you’d like to help CJ reach his goal this year, please share his story with others and visit his donation page.

Heartbreak and Hardships…sometimes life sucks

empowered

Sometimes I feel like I’m forced to face the same challenge a hundred times over. Same people, similar circumstances, over and over and over again. It seems like no matter what I do, I find myself in the middle of a new act in the exact same circus. It’s not easy. It’s not fun. It takes it’s toll on my body, my mind, and my spirit. Sometimes I swear I can feel my heart cracking.

As much as each experience breaks my heart a little more than the last, I continue to be grateful for the lessons I have learned along this bumpy road;

  1. Things are rarely as they seem
  2. Everyone wants to be heard, not everyone wants to be helped
  3. Dishonesty can take many forms; half-truths, withheld information, and deliberate misleading. Sometimes it pays to dig a little deeper
  4. Every person is doing the best that they can with the knowledge that they have
  5. I can only help people that want to be helped and only to the extent that they want to be helped
  6. Everyone needs, deserves, and is entitled to compassion and encouragement
  7. Mistakes are inevitable – Apologies are necessary
  8. The more you give, the more people will take; Personal boundaries are vital to personal well-being
  9. When I do the same as I’ve done, I continue to see the same results

Number 10 …. If I continue to find myself in the middle of a destructive cycle, it’s time to ask the question; what role do I play in the cycle? Am I enabling the pattern?

I usually take on the role of peacekeeper, which sometimes also translates to ‘enabler’.  I’ve allowed myself to be played as the rope in the middle of a tug-a-war (a war that isn’t even mine to fight!). I am responsible for taking on those roles. By removing myself from the cycle, change in that cycle is inevitable.

Not so long ago, I had the opportunity to put this theory to the test. It was probably one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. It was easily one of the most liberating as well.

We are all responsible for the choices we make in our lives. We are all responsible for the roles we play in it as well. If things aren’t working as they should, then is it not our responsibility to instill change?

Go for it!

Embrace your awesomeness!

If you enjoyed this post you may also enjoy Friendships, Forgiveness, and Jelly Beans

As always, I love to hear your thoughts 🙂 Feel free to leave your comments here or private messages can be sent via facebook

I Tortured My Kid With Song! Creative Parenting

Simon CowellHow many times have you wished you were different than you were? Wished your hair was straight instead of curly, or that you had a talent for cooking instead of burning, or that you were athletic instead of clumsy? I can’t tell you how often I’ve wished for a beautiful singing voice. I love music, I love to dance (can’t dance but I pretend I can), I love to sing (can’t sing but pretend I can). When my babies were little, they used to love when I sang them songs…actually, now that I think of it, they never actually asked me to sing….hmmm….interesting. Oh well. I sang to them a lot, when they went to sleep, when they woke up, as they got ready for school. Never any specific song, nope. I made up each song as I went along. I thought they loved it because my singing always made them laugh. I’ve noticed that the older they get, the more they plead with me to stop singing….they still laugh….most of the time.

Last week, I stumbled upon a gift that is sure to serve me well for the rest of my life. You will never believe what it was…my voice! My beautiful singing voice! Allow me to fill you in…what I am about to share with you is a true story…one that any parent can appreciate.

It was a Sunday like any other dedicated to cleaning up the house in preparation of a brand new week. There I was begging my 11 year old son to clean his room. I had tried everything to get him motivated to create a space he could relax in. I’ve hidden money in his room, I’ve bribed him with quality time exchanges, I’ve taken away his toys, I’ve made him do his own laundry, I’ve taken his beloved extra-curricular activities away, nothing seems to work long term. The best I got was a half-assed clean sweep.

On this day, in another attempt at motivation, I suggested he crank some music. It always worked for me, Dance! Sing! while you clean up. The job seems to do itself! For whatever reason, I can’t remember he said he couldn’t play the music in his room so I offered to sing to him…..WHAM! That’s when it happened, “No! No! Mom, don’t sing!”idea

“I’ll tell you what, I won’t sing if you clean your room, I mean really clean it. If you stop cleaning it before it’s done, I will sing.” He did as any kid his age would do. He called my bluff. Out of my mouth came Taylor Swift and WHAM! “Okay Mom! Okay! Look at me, I’m cleaning my room! See?” Within less than an hour his room was spotless! Brilliant!! That was a major discovery I made right there!!

Unfortunately, this technique will not work for every parent, only maybe those with a special kind of voice. All I’m saying is just for today trust in your whole being and embrace every part of you because sometimes what you may perceive as a fault may one day prove to be your greatest asset 🙂

Embrace your awesomeness!

If you liked this post, share it with others who will too! You may also like The Solo Adventure of a Geographically Challenged Mom, Mommy’s Escape – The end of a beautiful affair, and The Making of a Book That Broke My Heart

The Making of A Book That Broke My Heart

Death happens. It is the saddest most difficult part of life. We all experience death, no one is immune. It can happen any day, at any age, at any stage, to anyone. There is no warning, there is no real preparing, for how  do you say good-bye to someone you love? How do those you love say good-bye to you?

The day this harsh reality hit me, was the day Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo was born.

I remember looking at my children and accepting the reality that there are no guarantees that I would be granted another day with them. There are no guarantees that I will be there when they get married, or have children of their own. There are no guarantees that I will see them graduate or experience their fist date. No guarantees, no warning, no last hug or kiss good-bye. One day it could all be gone. That truth left me fearful. And yet I was filled with a deep sense of gratitude for each and every moment I had been gifted to that day.

Looking into their little faces, I wondered, if something were to happen to me, how long would it take them to begin to forget about the woman that loved them so deeply, the woman they refer to as Mom? How long would it take for them to forget about the crazy morning songs I sing to them when I wake them up? Or the silly nick names I give them? What would they remember of me? What would they miss the most? Who would they turn to when they needed their Mom?

That night, at 3am, I woke up frantically searching in the dark for a pen and paper. The first of the letters was born. The message was so beautiful and absolutely perfect, each word was written through tears for each word held within it the truth of a Mother’s love.

In the months that followed, more letters emerged. Always in the middle of the night, or just before falling asleep. Each letter was uplifting, encouraging, inspiring, and encompassed as much love as a letter could hold.  Each  letter provided guidance through life’s every day challenges and was written in a way that whether they were read as children or as adults, the messages that needed to be heard, would be.

Every letter broke my heart as I took myself out of this world and crossed over to the next where I would place myself watching over my children with all the love and protection of a Mother Angel. Every letter was created on tear stained sheets, in the dark, with a pen in one hand and Kleenex in the other. The whole process was heart wrenching and absolutely worthwhile. No matter what my children will always know that I love them, and through those letters they will feel the absolute, unconditional love of their Mother. They will know how to reach me, they will know my heart, and my deepest wish for their happiness. I have left no room for them to doubt that our love is strong enough to bridge this world and the next.

I felt compelled to share the letters with friends and family. I couldn’t have imagined the impact it would have. I am so pleased that with the help of Teresa DeGrosbois and Faye Levow, and the encouragement of so many Leaders in the transformational world such as best selling author Debra Poneman & Sheri Fink, Susan Heim with Chicken Soup for the Soul, and 6-Time EMMY Winner Shawne Duperon to name a few, Letters From Heaven Love Mom xo is now published and available for purchase. For more information visit our website.

Having the letters published took some careful consideration, these were intimate letters to my children. I would only have them published if it was possible for readers to add their own cherished memories, words of wisdom and love to the pages of the book. The team at Launch Pad Publishing made it happen. Artists Nicole Cote and The Heart Painter have turned the book into a treasured keepsake. Their work is exquisite. I couldn’t be more pleased with the results and I am excited to share these letters with you ❤

May your journey through the Letters be as powerful as mine ❤

All love,

Sandy Bucholtz

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